|Welcome to Golf Is A Funny Game's world famous collection of Golf Caddy Jokes.
Whether you're a golf caddy (or if you prefer, caddie), a looper, a jock or a bagman, we've got plenty of jokes you're sure to appreciate. For every
unappreciated caddy who's ever had to lug around some shmuck's clubs all day, watching them hack their way through a round of 100+ strokes, all the while
complaining how they 'never play this badly' or that you must be feeding them bad yardage information, these jokes are for you.
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|Golf Caddy Jokes and Golf Caddy Humor
Drown In A Lake
A hack golfer spends a day at a plush country club, playing golf, enjoying the luxury of a complimentary caddy. Being a hack
golfer, he plays like complete dogshit all day long. Round about the 18th hole, he spots a lake off to the left of the fairway.
He looks at the caddy and says, "I've played so poorly all day; I think I'm going to go drown myself in that lake."
The caddy looks back at him and says, "I don't think you could keep your head down that long."
"I'd move heaven and earth to be able to break 100 on this course," sighed George, the golfer.
"Try heaven," advised the caddy. "You've already moved most of the earth."
"Well Caddy, How do you like my game?"
"Very good, Sir! But personally I prefer Golf."
A pretty terrible golfer was playing a round of golf for which he had hired a looper. The round proved to be somewhat
tortuous for the caddie to watch and he was getting a bit exasperated by the poor play of his employer.
At one point the ball lay about 180 yards from the green and the as the golfer sized up his situation, he asked his caddie,
"Do you think I can get there with a 5-iron?" To which the caddie replied, "Eventually."
Best Shot of the Day
Larry sliced the bejeezus out of his drive and watched resignedly as the ball plummeted into the woods. He followed after and
found his ball - surrounded by thick undergrowth and wedged firmly between two tree roots. He contemplated the situation for
a few profoundly silent minutes then turned to his caddie and asked: "You know what shot I'm going to take here."
"Yes, sir," replied the boy as he took a hip flask of whiskey from the bag.
Golf's Not My Bag, Baby
"I want you to know that this is not the game I usually play," snapped an irate golfer to his caddie.
"I should hope not, sir. But tell me," inquired the caddie, "what game do you usually play?"
Your First Time?
Golfer: "Well, I have never played this badly before!"
Caddy: "I didn't realize you had played before, Sir."
A Horrible Crime
Golfer: "Caddy, do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday?"
Caddy: "The way you play, sir, its a crime any day of the week!"
Golfer: "Please stop checking you watch all the time...It's distracting!"
Caddy: "This isn't a watch, sir, its a compass!"
Golf's a Funny Game
After a series of disastrous holes, the hackish amateur golfer in an effort to smother his rage laughed hollowly and said to his
caddie: "This golf is a funny game."
"It's not supposed to be," said the boy gravely.
That's Not My Ball
Golfer: "That can't be my ball, caddie. It looks far too old.", said the player looking at a ball deep in the trees.
Caddy: "Well, it's a long time since we started, sir."
Reachable Par 4
Approaching the tee box on a short par 4, the cocky golfer boasted to his caddy, "This hole's good for one long drive and a
putt." He swung mightily and topped his ball which rolled about a 30 yards, just past the ladies tee box.
His caddie handed him a club and remarked: "And now for one hell of a putt."
You're No Trevino
Jimmy believed himself a superior caddie. He certainly had a superior attitude towards the man whose clubs he carried. Why
only last month he had caddied for Lee Trevino, and now each time his client asked for a 5-wood, the boy would sneer,
"Lee Trevino used a 4-iron from here." And so it continued all the way around. The caddie recommended the clubs Trevino
would have used and the golfer's game went rapidly from bad to worse.
Finally, at the eighteenth, there was a huge lake to cross.
"OK, smart ass," said the golfer, "what would Trevino suggest here?"
"I think if Lee had come this far with you, he'd say, `Use an old ball."'
Golfer: Caddiemaster, that boy isn't even eight years old."
Caddiemaster: "It's better that way, sir. He probably can't count past ten yet."
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