|Welcome to Golf Is A Funny Game's world famous collection of Funny Golf Terminology and Golf Slang.
Whether you're a professional golfer or just a beginner, we've got plenty of funny golf slang and golf terminology you're sure to appreciate.
If you don't know what 'Al Qaeda Camel' means, or what type of shot elicits an 'OJ Simpson' or an 'Elton John,' then you had better read on and find out just
what kind of comedy you've been missing out on. You're bound to witness a few of these in every round and you need to be prepared when the moment
arrives. Your golfing partners are sure to enjoy your hilarious new golf vocabulary, filled with insightful new terms like the 'necrophiliac handjob,' the 'German
virgin' and the 'nursing home bus crash.' Still confused? Then read on, my friend.
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|Funny Golf Slang and Humorous Golf Terminology
A 'James Joyce' or A 'Book of Poetry' : an impossible read (used for putts)
"This goddamn putt's a real Book of Poetry."
A 'Rock Hudson' or A 'Tom Cruise' : a putt that looks straight, but it clearly isn't
"Every frickin' putt I've had today has been a Rock Hudson."
An 'Osama Bin Laden' or A 'Saddam Hussein' : going from one bunker to another
"I bet you 10 bucks that Bob pulls a Bin Laden from that sand trap."
A 'Rodney King' : over-clubbed
"I was so determined not to come up short that I Rodney King'd that 5 iron."
An 'Al Qaeda Camel' : in the sand and sure to get f*cked
"Way to hit it into the short-sided pot bunker, you Al Qaeda Camel."
An 'O.J. Simpson' : getting away with one
"Nice shot, OJ. Right off the trees and back into the fairway."
A 'Kelly Clarkson' : chunky, but still working
"I Kelly Clarkson'd the hell outta my 8 iron, but I'm sitting just short of the green."
A 'Muhammed Ali' : when you're shaking over an important putt
"Did you see Joe pull a Muhammed Ali over that birdie putt?"
A 'German Virgin' : guten tight (that's 'good and tight' for the phonetically challenged)
"You're gonna like where that wedge ended up. It's a real German Virgin."
A 'Rosie O'Donnell' : just plain fat
"Sonnovabitch, another f*cking Rosie O'Donnell!"
A 'Condom' : it's safe, but it didn't feel very good
"I caught that condom right on the heel."
A 'Beyonce' : a bit chunky, but still on the dance floor
"Stellar Beyonce, there Ricky. But I think you're on the front edge of the green."
A 'Nursing Home Bus Crash' : a whole lotta nasty breaks
"I would've shot a 82 if it weren't for the Nursing Home Bus Crash on the last 3 holes."
A 'Paris Hilton' : spoiled; wasted a good opportunity
"After bombing my drive I proceeded to Paris Hilton my approach shot."
An 'Elephant's A$$hole' : it's high and it stinks (usually for popped up drives)
"Wow, that's a real Elephant's A$$hole if I've ever seen one."
A 'Gay Midget's Mouth' : it's low and it sucks
"That bladed 7 iron reminds me of a Gay Midget's Mouth."
A 'Danny DeVito' : an ugly little five footer
"I've got a Danny DeVito left to save double."
A 'Joe Pesci' : a mean little five footer
A 'Sonny Bono' : straight into the trees
"I snap hooked my drive on #2, Sonny Bono style."
An 'Elton John' : a big bender that lips the rim
"Man, I almost dropped that Elton John on #4 for a birdie."
A 'Pat Sajak' : too much spin
"I thought I had the perfect wedge in there, but I got screwed by Pat Sajak."
A 'Necrophiliac Handjob' : a dead pull
"Nice Necrophiliac Handjob, Tom."
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